This one is.....well...sad.......I've written several like this one over the years. I need to find that journal. As I said before....it will mean different things to different people.......Maybe it will make you remember a departed loved one....a long lost pet.......embrace what it means to you.


Teardrops Fall

Misty Stars Raining from the Heavens

Eternal Sadness

As some of you know, I served a Tour of Duty in Iraq in 2004. These men listed below were there with me and were assigned or attached to the Unit I served with. It is said that Freedom doesn't come cheaply. These men, like so many before them, paid that price with their blood.

PFC Nathan Brown 21 on 11 April 2004

SPC Edgar Daclan 24 on 10 September 2004

SFC Joselito Villanueva 36 on 27 September 2004

SGT Micheal Uvanni 27 on 1 October 2004

In all, 193 men and women in uniform died in the 1st Infantry Division area of operations. I wish I knew them all personally and I hope none are ever forgotten. All left behind someone....a wife, a girlfriend, children, parents or at least friends. All were volunteers....all knew that saying "I do so solemnly swear..." could mean their lives.....and they all still stood up.

Today was for them.....

"No Mission too Difficult, No Sacrifice too Great ......Duty First" 1st Infantry Division Motto

I've been pretty damned happy lately. Sure there are bumps here and there but no Path is ever smooth.

COX: Hmmmm.....haven't felt the passion to play lately. I've gone to some events and hung out a bit but as far as hardcore playing....not so much. I did go to an Event last night for Ode to Joy. It was a great time. Mark isn't a very social creature so he stands back and watches a lot....marveling at Human interaction but it was great to see a lot of people I haven't in a loooong time.....Callypsa, Fixette, Starless Night, Anne Blaze, Ruarc as well as Joy herself. Her Player is probably one of the nicest Players in the game.....cheerful, helpful and genuine. I wish there were a lot more like him. I do miss some of the people I used to see all of the time. They made the game enjoyable.

GW: I have started playing Guild Wars again and even that isn't sucking at my life like COX used too......though.....Age of Conan is coming.......I may disappear for the sunlit world when it arrives. Graphically it is a stunning game...truely beautiful. I do enjoy it and best of all......no drama!

VA: Well...these folks are eating up a lot of my time. Comp hearings, examinations, X-Rays, PTSD group and a lot more. I have meds that are supposed to help me sleep but the truth is I have no problems sleeping now. I look forward to it in fact. Must be the good dreams I've been having of late.

I guess sometimes we just have a void in our lives.....something missing....and sometimes we don't see it or even have a clue what it is. I found my Muse....and my Zen...and my Way couldn't be much clearer.

Cheers

The fields aflame
Ashes float in the breeze
Annointing soil far away

Meditation will not carry you to another world, but it will reveal the most profound and awesome dimensions of the world in which you already live. Calmly contemplating these dimensions and bringing them into the service of compassion and kindness is the right way to make rapid gains in meditation as well as in life. - Hsing Yun

I've been a fan of Haiku for many years. Lately I've thought of trying to write some again and have been looking around at various sites that feature the works of others. I found one that had this and a great many others. http://www.haikupoetshut.com/ A lot of nice work here.

*Walks down the street whistling, stops to look in the window and then continues on*

A few posts ago I said that I had Lost my Zen. I really enjoy Zen....it is a great Philosophy and a great guide to living your life. Its also very difficult in this day and age. Zen is about the simple life......keeping things basic and our life today seems to be all about complexity.

One of the keys to living Zen lies in maintaining the Beginner's Mind. Now I can hear people asking,"What in the hell is that?" Simply put, it is approaching everything as if you are doing or seeing it for the first time. Imagine what your day would be like if you could go to work for the first time instead of to the 'same old job you've been going to for years'. Remember the excitement? Remember what it was like to be dating your spouse....the excitement of dancing or going to the movies and dinner. Beginner's Mind is about that feeling or excitement, that wonder every day in everything we do.

It applies to people as well......treat each meeting as the first. I know that's very hard, especially today when we are surrounded by negativity and we feel assualted from every side. We want to fortify ourselves and protect ourselves from what someone has said or done before and truthfully Beginner's Mind doesn't mean going in unprepared..it means giving each person a chance to start anew at each meeting. Have they changed? Perhaps not or perhaps they had a bad day the first time you met them and you saw them at their worst. Maybe this time they are having a good day or maybe they have changed. If they are the same person who hurt or offended you in the past then you deal with them in a firm manner. The point is that if you follow the "normal" path you'll never know because in your mind they are already branded. With Beginner's Mind, its a new day with a new person before you.

Its easy to be cynical.....god knows I'm guilty of it. I grew up in a small town where a person was as good as their word or their actions. I still tend to look at people in that light. I tend to think "screw me and your done" and honestly I tend to react that way now but I used to try to look on things with the Beginner's Mind and I need to start doing that more again. That's what I meant when I said I had lost my Zen. Now that I remember what it looks like I can start getting it back.